Maybe the relationship that is in conflict needs some breathing room. Healthy relationships can survive “down time.”


One of my NVC teachers, Gina Cenciose gave this wonderful metaphor for healthy relationships: “Your friends should be the flowers on your table, not the air you breathe.” Another great quote of hers was: “Do you have relationships, or case loads?”


Some conflicts in relationship arise when we unconsciously project onto the other person what we need to work on in our own hearts. Does the other person's behavior drive you nuts? See if you can look more deeply within to connect to your own self-identity. If you are struggling in a relationship, take some time in solitude to gently assess how you genuinely feel in the other person's presence. If you notice even thinking about it weighs you down, it might be a “Light's Off” relationship. Give yourself a break. The “Lights” will come back on in the relationship if it's meant to be. Consider how precious your one wild life is and consciously decide where to devote your attention.



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